I am not known to be afraid of anything in particular. Not only that, I am known to possess considerable amout of courage-the courage to speak out my opinion (which sometimes lead to straining of few relations though that didn’t stop me from doing so), the courage to stand up for what I believe, the courage to walk alone at midnight in the midst of pools of stray dogs, and on a lighter note, the courage to kill a cockroach in a TT court (which some of my mates still fondly recollect ;). But, even I know not much about my fears, until I found this and the difference it made in my life. It is that fear which made me maintain some distance with everyone I know. It is that fear which prevented me from entering into deep personal relations. It is that fear which kept me away from all such emotions and helped me in more than one way. At the same time, it is that fear, which leaves me wondering if I should get rid of it to experience something better and greater, whose possibility I doubt. It is the fear of getting hurt. Many questions crop up my mind as this topic arises for which I don’t know the answers just as I don’t know the reasons behind the very fear. Neither do I think reading some essays on psychoanalysis helps. I believe that someday I will find the answer through my own experience. It might be a hard and long route to opt for but in things related to heart, I prefer to trust myself!
P.S: To post this is the most daring thing I ever did!!
She is as tender as a leaf,as strong as a diamond, as lovely as a gentle breeze,as rough as a storm, as warm as morning sun, as cold as ice can be. She is full of surprises,a contrasting personality.Thanks to the internet, you could get a glimpse of her mind!
She...
About Me
- Rekha Devarapalli
- “To learn and to grow” is my life’s motto. I love reading, writing, hiking and kayaking. I enjoy playing drums and practicing Tai Chi. And I am looking to add a new skill every year :)
4 comments:
Reminds me of the Sprite Ad - loosely translated from Hindi (my hindi is kinda bad) -
Everyone has their own fears. Everyone's throat get's parched. Don't fear "fear". Step beyond the fear !!
On a lighter note - The first thing a trapeeze artist who walks on a tightrope suspended between two sticks (litreally at 50-100 feet high) is taught is "Never Look Down"
@Karthik
My fav line frm the same Ad(untranslated) is - "Dar ke aage hai Jeet" which I often use. In fact, the very purpose of the post is to leave that fear behind.
Aghh - I missed the punch line :(((
Nice one Rekha. Looks like you are one brave lady. :)
Fear of getting hurt emotionally, I feel, stems when you expect someone to behave in a particular way, or something to happen in particular fashion. Expectations raises our hopes, fires our desires, makes us feel possessed, and leads to fear of losing, of getting hurt.
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