Believe in YOU!

In 2016, I was selected to attend a 'Winning Career Strategies for high-performing managers' workshop at Deloitte. It is a series of 3 2-day sessions in 3 different cities and the first session was in Portland in October. The fall colors and the waterfront view from our office was beautiful. Most of Day 1 was focused on self-awareness and did not sound exciting to me as I always thought of myself as a reflective person with a clear head. I wasn't sure what I was going to learn about myself in one day that I did not already know, and wished they focused on other career strategies. Day 2 was about selecting a 'Board of Directors' for yourself that would guide you throughout your career, which seemed more interesting.

We were all asked to take a Myers Briggs personality test a week ago and the results would be shared on Day 1. I have taken a couple of personality tests before and I always knew the results. I am a driver, planner with a logical and analytical mindset. The results of Myers Briggs were the same in all categories except one. In one category, it identified me as an original, imaginative, conceptual person versus a realistic, practical person analyzing facts. And boy, that threw me off. I struggled to digest that. Those results were based on answering about 150 questions in roughly 10 minutes and I wondered if they could really be of any consequence. But, instead of letting it go, I decided to dig a little deeper. The really nice coach from Flynn Heath Holt patiently listened to me, asked me a few questions and said that I look at the big picture and am not afraid to take risks which is why I fall into that Intuitive/Pioneer category. Coincidentally, I received the same set of comments from my senior manager a couple of days before, to which I did not pay a lot of attention. I discussed with another Deloitte mentor in the workshop and she said the same based on what she saw that day. Now, hearing it for the third time meant something to me. It could all just be a happy coincidence or the mentors were being really nice or it could be that I always wanted to be a visionary but thought I was not. I do not know the reason but I decided to believe in it. On my flight back home, I told myself that I am a visionary and I always look at the big picture. I let it sink in.

Just believing in it made a lot of difference in my life and my outlook. I do not know if I have always looked at the big picture till the day before, but from that day on magically, I always did. All it took was to believe that I could. You could too. #BelieveinYOU.

Love at first sight

I do believe in love at first sight. I sometimes think that even the most rational decisions that we make are based on some kind of intuition that develops in the first few minutes which we justify later with some facts and some logic. And trust me, you can always find facts and logic to suit yourself. Now, don't ask me how that intuition works. The author of 'Blink', Malcolm Gladwell, tries to explain in his book as to what happens in those first few seconds and calls it the power of rapid cognition. In normal words, I think he is trying to say that love at first sight is perfectly rational. Now, I call that some conclusion! So, where is all this leading to?

Few months ago, me and my husband were looking to buy a house. Yes, for someone who so strongly believed that the idea of owning a place to live in does not make sense conceptually or financially, that was a big change. Let's just attribute the change to 'marriage' for now, though I would explain when we meet why it all made so much 'sense' given the economy, our current situation blah blah blah. So, we had a fixed budget and a list of parameters and we set out to evaluate all the houses with this list in hand and our budget in mind. To give you some background, I did real estate valuation when working with Deloitte and had a decent idea of the US real estate market and valuation. Accompanied by a good real estate agent, we had all the tools to make a rational purchase. A couple of weekends and few house visits later, we made slight changes to the budget and the list and continued with our search.

On a Friday morning, while I was compiling the list of houses that we ought to visit over the coming weekend, I saw a new listing pop up on my screen. It was a beautiful waterfront property (with the backyard facing a lake) with a great view from the balcony, so I decided to check it out even though I had no intention of buying the property as the asking price was above our budget. Moreover, why would I pay a premium for the lake? Come Saturday morning, we were standing outside the house with our realtor who opened the door for us. The moment we entered the house, I can tell you, I was in love with it. We haven't even seen the water or the balcony yet, nor did we match it with our budget or the parameter list, but I knew this was it. The lake and the balcony only added fuel to the fire. Then came tons of logic and justifications while comparables and valuations are adjusted to fit our thoughts (I did learn a lot at Deloitte ;). And guess what, we are proud owners of this home now (Technically, we have a negligible share of it). Welcome to our first love, our new home :) The lake view is totally worth it!!

Time to fly

Newly married, a nice husband, new place and a beautiful house awaiting with all the time in the world to enjoy, a scenario I thought any normal person would find exciting. Strange enough, I feel lost. I am not there yet but I feel like an alien about to enter a wonderland. I am not sure if I could ever belong to that place but I feel removed from my world. Sooner ot later, I knew the time would come when I have to be part of someone else's world, but any amount of preparation isn't enough to face the moment. You built your own world, bit by bit, over the years and all you could take along are two tangible enclosed boxes weighing 40 kilos in total. It makes you feel uneasy and wierd though it should hardly matter in this world of technology where everything is just a click away!

Does it sound familiar to you?

Now, I am married!

Yes, it is a strange feeling. Is it the feeling of oneness or the idea of belonging to someone or the thought that there is someone always with you, I am not sure. Not that you never had people to care for you before, your family has always been there, not that you have lived alone, friends always made your day, not that there was a particular gap in your life waiting to be filled by this person, but when he comes in, your whole world changes.It begins to revolve around this one person and then you wonder like I am now doing, "Isn't it strange?"

Random

I want my epithet read: "A fighter to the core"

I think I was more matured in my teens than in my twenties

It is not so much about success and failure as much it is about what you really want to do

Express but never explain

Isn't it funny that time travels at different speeds...esp. slow in weekdays n very fast during weekends

Silly me!

I thought our life is in our control
Poor me, little did I know that
All I own is my 'shameless' smile
As my colleagues rightly put it!

Do you want me to be numb?

You know nothin is gonna stay
You know life will move on
Yet you feel the pain
Yet you feel the happiness

You meet people
You part with them
Its so natural
With so many thngs around

You know nothin is gonna stay
You know life will move on
Yet you feel the pain
Yet you feel the happiness

The truth is so obvious
So you want me to be numb?
Never let you know the pain
And remain forever mum

You know nothin is gonna stay
You know life will move on
Yet you feel the pain
Yet you feel the happiness

My Mad Logic

Bhagwan ne aisa plan banaya ki
Har kisi ke life mein ek tragedy ho
Koi bahut pyari si cheez
Milte milte hi miss ho jaye
Aur woh usi ki chahat mein mar jaaye
Marke woh bhoot ban jaaye
Bhoot ban ke logon ko pareshan kare
Phir log bhagwan ko yaad kare
Aur Bhagwan hamesha jeete rahe

My First Song...

If you don't find time
When I want
And keep me waiting
While you play

I will still talk
When you want
And sing
The song you like

I will play with you
Anytime
And be there
All the time

But...
You will never be
the same for me again
I will never be
the same ol' girl u know!

Thought of the day!

"There is a beauty in randomness that one can't define, probably the reason why the nature can't be simulated"